Male directors should stop writing about female icons

Dear all males, please, please leave female celebrities alone. You made them suffer enough when they were alive. There is no need to put their spirit through it as well.

What if you never outgrew your childish infatuation with a celebrity, and what if you got to the ripe old age of 59 (the same age as Peter Morgan, creator of The Crown) and still decided to drag out the ghost of your childhood crush for the sake of money and views.

I am sure there are female writers for The Crown (one to be exact) but seriously, The Crown? More like The Crass. Let’s forget that Queen Elizabeth II was actually the queen of an entire country, or that Princess Anne competed in the Olympics. Let’s parade Lady Di in her most infamous outfits and showcase her most terrible failures within the royal family. Was that all she was there for?

I know you are taking your ‘artistic licence’ and ‘repeating the facts’. But do you really need to? Women like Marilyn Monroe, Judy Garland and Pamela Anderson are already incredibly famous. I understand that accounts of history can be informative. But how about we tell a story that millions across the globe don’t already know? Come on Hollywood. Have some creativity. How about Frances Perkins, the first woman to serve on the U.S. cabinet? Or Bessie Coleman, the first female African American international pilot?

Not only do we revive the same stories again and again, but they have been dramatised to the most sickening point. Looking at you, Andrew Dominik. It must have been a squeeze for you to mention Marilyn Monroe’s work for orphans or care for animals in a two-and-a-half-hour film of her tragedy. But yes, don’t worry guys, he managed to squeeze in an imaginary blowjob and throw in a fake abortion for good measure too.

There have been plenty of truthful biopics about female celebrities that have not caused harm. But if we are going to drag out their legacies for the sake of a few men with greasy hair fiddling with themselves, should we not do it for all of our icons? I don’t see many biopics about Minnie Riperton or Oprah Winfrey.

The truth is we shouldn’t be dramatising any tragic figures in the first place. Hollywood needs to resist its innate obsession with white females and give up any plans to dredge up more icons for the sake of wealth and views. Hollywood should keep its boner in its pants and continue with what they know, remaking old films and hiring Leonardo DiCaprio for every role.

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