{"id":1758,"date":"2025-06-02T11:17:10","date_gmt":"2025-06-02T10:17:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/theoptimistmagazine.co.uk\/?p=1758"},"modified":"2025-06-06T16:08:44","modified_gmt":"2025-06-06T15:08:44","slug":"billy-and-beyond-a-mothers-journey-to-honour-her-sons-legacy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jusmedia.co.uk\/theoptimist\/2025\/06\/02\/billy-and-beyond-a-mothers-journey-to-honour-her-sons-legacy\/","title":{"rendered":"Billy and Beyond: a mother\u2019s journey to honour her son\u2019s legacy\u00a0"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

After the tragic passing of her son at the hands of a recreational drug, a mother from Sussex has dedicated her life to an award-winning campaign around the dangers of drug use.<\/em> <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nicci Parish was fast asleep when the phone rang in the early hours of the 10th November, 2020. The contents of that phone call changed the course of her life in the most unimaginable of ways. The previous day had marked her eldest son’s 24th birthday, marred by the tediousness of lockdown, stuck inside unable to celebrate with friends. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Billy was full of life, colour, and endless creativity which carried him through life. He loved experimenting with fashion and hairstyles, modelling, and cooking. All he had wanted to do was celebrate, properly mark his birthday, just have a little bit of harmless fun. Working as a carer through lockdown was no easy feat, despite his love for the job and helping people, and so his birthday seemed like the optimal chance to unwind. What came next changed a family forever. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the early hours of the 10th November, and after a few drinks, Billy and his girlfriend took MDMA at her flat. MDMA, also known as ecstasy, is a Class A drug in the UK. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It didn\u2019t take long for his health to begin to deteriorate. In a state of panic, Billy\u2019s girlfriend contacted their friends, unsure of what to do. She phoned her mum, who informed Nicci of the situation while an ambulance was called. Billy was gravely unwell, his blood unable to clot, which meant he was rapidly bleeding out through his eyes, nose, ears and from the lines doctors had put in. Suffering from liver and kidney failure, Billy was put on dialysis. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI was told that he\u2019d taken a recreational drug, and I didn’t actually know what MDMA was, and I thought, \u2018I’m a mum and I don’t know anything about recreational drugs\u2019, the only thing I’d ever said to Billy was \u2018just say no\u2019,\u201d Nicci, 51, tells The Optimist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nicci, having rushed to the hospital to be by her son\u2019s side, was limited by Covid-19 restrictions that forced her to wait alone for updates on Billy\u2019s condition.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cRight at the beginning in the hospital, I was thinking \u2018something has to be done, I need to warn.\u2019 We need to have a bit more knowledge.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

After two days spent in the Intensive Therapy Unit at Worthing Hospital, the decision was made to transfer Billy to Kings College Hospital in London for frozen plasma treatment that gave him a five percent chance of survival. Despite the risks involved with transporting him so far, it was the last option available to try and save Billy\u2019s life, and he survived the journey. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

After the very best efforts and care from doctors and nurses, Billy passed away on the 12th November 2020, moments before Nicci arrived at the hospital.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A recreational party drug, an attempt at escape, had taken a life and destroyed countless others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The loss of a child is a parent’s deepest fear and it had suddenly become Nicci\u2019s entire reality. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019re enjoying reading this article, for more on Nicci check out our Billy and Beyond podcast<\/a>!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt’s really hard because you have a stigma with grief and people don’t want to talk to you because they don’t know what to say. You have an even bigger stigma with being a bereaved parent; I’ve had people cross the road to avoid me or not look me in the eye. You have the added bit of it being a drug death, and drug deaths carry their own stigma.\u201d Nicci says. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBefore Christmas, we were organising his funeral, and after that, I decided I wanted to do something, and that’s when I wrote Billy’s story, and came up with the idea for Billy and Beyond<\/a>, which was set up in August 2021. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nicci sought to build something out of the ruins of her family’s lives, and partnered with her close friend, Amy Bower, 47, a community development manager. They came up with the name and direction of what they wanted to achieve. Billy and Beyond was born with the goal of educating and supporting young people and children on the dangers of recreational drug use. Family and friends took on different roles in order to build the Community Interest Company and create a direction for Nicci\u2019s vision. It was important for her to create a judgement-free space for people to share their personal journeys. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWe are not naive to think we are going to eradicate young people taking drugs, but what we believe in is that if you can encourage people and their parents or carers to have open conversations, then you have a better chance of people being equipped with the knowledge, skills and the bravery if it goes wrong.\u201d Amy, Director of Billy and Beyond, tells The Optimist. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

This led to the charity offering drug awareness workshops for young people and children, which included visiting schools to inform on the dangers of drug use, and this became popular across West Sussex schools and colleges. Nicci felt strongly about catering workshops to parents as well, as she realised how little knowledge there is available to parents, aside from \u2018Just Say No\u2019, an anti-drug campaign that now feels outdated. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cInitially my goal was to educate and give young people knowledge on recreational drugs, but more than that, it was about giving the parents the tools and awareness to speak to young people, because I didn’t have that. When I do workshops now with parents, I make it really clear that you don’t have to know everything, and it’s fine as long as we’re talking about it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe workshops that we do are not all about saying no anymore, because sometimes that\u2019s not an option, we talk about safety and how to keep safe. I don’t think we\u2019re gonna stop it, but if people are educated, hopefully we will prevent more young deaths from recreational drugs.\u201d Nicci says.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In 2023, Nicci worked with filmmaker Morgan Films<\/a> on creating an animation that told Billy\u2019s story and highlighted the charity\u2019s message. They wanted to create something that encapsulated Billy\u2019s spirit, and could also be used as a material to educate others on drug safety. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Billy\u2019s Story depicts the decline of Billy\u2019s health and the Parish family\u2019s grief, using edgy art styles and the signature purple hues of Billy and Beyond. The film is shown in workshops as a hard hitting reminder of how quickly things can change and go wrong, leaving a lasting impact and a lot of food for thought. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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